


Millennia

by IMissYouSoFar



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-16
Updated: 2015-08-16
Packaged: 2018-04-15 00:35:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4586265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IMissYouSoFar/pseuds/IMissYouSoFar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two years after the accident, Gerard has gone brain-dead. Frank makes the decision whether or not to take him off life support.</p><p>"I've been gone from this world for what seems like millennia, looking for nothing short of a miracle. I only ever wanted to come home. Please, won't you let me go? When I have nowhere left I could run away. Would you lie to me; tell me I'll be okay? Close my eyes and lay me in my tomb. And pull the trigger and send me home."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Millennia

          Frank Iero hated hospitals more than anything in the world, but he was there more often than not. It had been two years since the accident, and Gerard still showed no signs of waking up. This time was different, though, because something drastic had happened in the few days Frank hadn’t been able to visit. Gerard was brain-dead. He was officially gone, only being kept alive by machines like nobody ever should be.

          Frank held the older man’s hand tightly, the last one to say goodbye today. The ring was still on his finger, as was Gerard’s. They had been married a year before the accident happened. A year Frank begged to live again every night. He would have done everything different. The man would have let his husband do whatever he wished, and they would have stayed in more so Frank could just look into Gerard’s eyes. He missed that more than anything. Most of all, Frank would have told Gerard he loved him more, and he would have stopped him from going out that night.

          _“Gerard, I’m not feeling well. Can you take the movies back for me?” Frank asked from their couch, gesturing towards the rented films on the entertainment center._

_Gerard turned around in his chair from the desk, tearing his attention away from his work to give his attention to Frank. The drawing wasn’t finished, but he knew he could finish it as soon as he got home. “Okay, Sweetheart,” he mumbled, getting up to grab his coat. It was winter and the roads were icy._

_Frank smiled and thanked him softly, leaning up for a kiss before the other left the house._

_When Gerard pulled out of the driveway, he honked three times as he always did, signifying an, “I love you.” It was sort of their Mizpah. After he reached the highway, Gerard looked down at the movies for just a split second, not noticing the car in front of him stopping suddenly._

_His foot came down on the petal harshly, breath catching in his throat. He was able to stop just in time, finally breathing and trying to calm down. “That was cl-“ The car behind him smashed into his own vehicle, and his head whipped forward. His car went forward and hit the one in front, glass shattering everywhere._

_All he wanted to do was get home._

          Frank let the tears fall down quickly as he rubbed his husband’s knuckles with his thumb, bringing his hand up for a kiss. “I love you so much, Geebear,” he whispered through the tears, leaning up to stroke Gerard’s face, or what he could of it because the breathing tube was strapped to his cheeks. The machine beeped softly in the background, making it hard for Frank to concentrate.

          “I’m. . . I’m so sorry. I should have been the one to go. I-I should have let you finish your drawing,” he murmured, gently kissing Gerard’s forehead. “You remember how you would read to me when I was sick?” There was no answer, but Frank tried to smile anyways. “I brought one of your favorites today. I thought maybe. . . you’d like to hear one last chapter before. . .”

          Frank pulled the chair closer to Gerard’s hospital bed, setting the book down in his lap and pulling Gerard’s lifeless hand into his own. _“When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday party with a part of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton,”_ Frank read slowly, not able to stop his own tears.

 

          Frank read to his lover for what seemed like hours, but in reality was only thirty minutes, finishing the chapter. _“Frodo did not see him again for a long time.”_ The doctor came in right as Frank had said the line straight from the book, and placed her hand on his shoulder.

          “Mr. Iero, take as much time as you need. When you are finished, we will take off his respirator and unplug the machines,” Dr. Jacobs informed. Frank nodded slowly, looking over at Gerard again.

          As the doctor left, Frank stood up before sitting on the bed with Gerard, caressing his hair and kissing his forehead over and over. He had gotten so thin in these two years, and his skin almost looked gray, but Gerard was still the most gorgeous thing Frank had ever seen.

          The younger man started singing their song to the love of his life, resting his forehead on Gerard’s and closing his eyes. He thought about their wedding, and how they danced, bodies swaying in perfect timing together. Happy times, Frank had thought, that would never come back. But the feelings in his heart would always stay the same.

          Frank would never be ready, but he didn’t want Gerard to suffer any longer after fighting for so long. He stood up and pressed the button for the nurse, telling him that he needed the doctor.

          Dr. Jacobs let Frank hold Gerard while she worked the respirator out, machines starting to beat like crazy. “It’s okay to let go, Baby. It’s okay to let go,” the man on the bed whispered as he cried, face in his best friend’s neck. “I love you so much.”

          When the line went flat, Frank looked up and could’ve sworn that he saw Gerard smiling, like he was finally free. He wanted this, Frank knew. The man softly kissed his husband’s lips one more time, and they didn’t feel anything like they used to. But they were Gerard’s lips, and he loved them as he would any other day.

 

          Cleaning out his desk was the worst part, Frank found. Some of Gerard’s drawings had been put up all over the house, because Frank cherished them now more than ever. It was hard to touch the pencils and not put them back, instead placing them in a storage box to be kept in a closet.

          Gerard didn’t deserve that, Frank thought. But he forced himself to keep working until he finally burst into tears again, seeing the first drawing he made for Frank. “I can’t do this,” he whispered, putting the pencils back on the desk exactly where they had been.

         

          His shirts all still smelled like Gerard, and Frank slept next to them every single night, putting a new one over the pillow every night and putting it in its rightful place on Gerard’s side of the bed. It wasn’t the same, that was for sure, but he did it anyway because he couldn’t stand not doing it.

 

          When the time for the funeral came, Frank wasn’t as prepared as he thought he would be. He had cried, and begged to see Gerard one more time as he was dragged away. He eventually composed himself and helped Mikey and the others carry the coffin to the hearse.

          Frank stayed behind for hours after the service ended, just sitting next to the mound of freshly poured dirt in his suit, one hand pulling up grass. “Gerard, we had a lot of great times together,” he whispered to the wind, tears drying on his face. “You. . . completed my life. Kept me going and helped me save myself. I can’t thank you enough for that.” Slowly, Frank stood up, knowing he would be back tomorrow, but needing to get this out now. “Thank you for taking me on our adventure, Gerard. I had a lovely time.”

          With that, Frank Iero walked away from his late husband’s grave, getting into his car and starting it. The wind picked up and blew the fall leaves around, making the man shiver until his heat was turned on. As he left the graveyard, Frank couldn’t help but feel like it was going to get better. Gerard has ruined his life in the best way possible, and the memories could last a lifetime.

          Frank had set Gerard free, and ended his suffering after the two long years of giving his all. The sun was setting as he pulled over to the road.

          He honked three times before turning in the direction if his home.


End file.
